I can't be your secret or your second choice, I must and for most have to be first and only choice, when you look me in the eyes I want to see the love, I want to feel the intensity of you barring your soul to me, I want to feel your heart beat while I am standing in front of you, I want to feel the butterflies coming from your stomach, and I want to see a skip in your step, not just mine, I want TRUE LOVE!
follow my eyes an if my heart stops when i touch your lips, take me away for a total eclipse your presents strong take me along let your heart sing a song lullaby as wisp away the tear in your eye
my heart sings a song, a song just for you, you will hear it in your sleep and when your thinking of me, that is called a connection, one you and I will grow too have, I will be froze with amazement from the beauty of your eyes, if your heart happens to stop, i shall bring you back to me, and shed a thousand tears, because I have you finally just for me
for me, for you, it was meant to be to meet you. Feel the hours turn, look as the clock turns the day will come when i step to your door an knock. Then you will look at the clock see time for a moment has stopped then we can take that long hand to hand walk an really begin to talk.
The anticipation of the wait will be well worth it, just to see you standing before me, the clock will stop and time will freeze and we stroll along and shoot the breeze, figure more out then we already have, we are each others angels, that came about, the time of need to lean and talk and build each other up, stay above water, that is what this relationship is about, two strong individuals & talented to say the least, we live hours apart but a connection from the heart. I can't wait for the day that we meet, the earth will stop and the angels will sing, two beautiful souls to finally meet ♥
<3 Wrote by: Marcy Schulze & Will Clark “A great friend”
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Saturday, November 26, 2011
LOVE OVER COMES!!!!
They think she is a troubled girl, alcohol problems, drug problem, haha! All they have to do is enter her world, take a good look and see she is not who they believe her to be....
She has a heart and she repeats this thousands of times, her heart will reach out nation wide.....
Ignorance & Hate just try & step in her way.....
They try to test her faith & ability to love.... is she going to flip out if we mess with the people she loves??
Can we trigger her temper & wipe that smile off of her face??? Knock her down one more time, see if she stays laying in place this time!!
Not the girl, who is misunderstood, she will always be the same no matter what game they bring her way, you can bring the hate, you can bring the fire, but LOVE & LAUGHTER is what she DESIRES!!! You can not win or over come....LOVE ALWAYS wins the battle, come on!!! I KNOW YOU ARE NOT THAT DUMB!!!!
She has a heart and she repeats this thousands of times, her heart will reach out nation wide.....
Ignorance & Hate just try & step in her way.....
They try to test her faith & ability to love.... is she going to flip out if we mess with the people she loves??
Can we trigger her temper & wipe that smile off of her face??? Knock her down one more time, see if she stays laying in place this time!!
Not the girl, who is misunderstood, she will always be the same no matter what game they bring her way, you can bring the hate, you can bring the fire, but LOVE & LAUGHTER is what she DESIRES!!! You can not win or over come....LOVE ALWAYS wins the battle, come on!!! I KNOW YOU ARE NOT THAT DUMB!!!!
Sunday, November 20, 2011
THE ABSENT
It's you that gives me the strength I need…to feel like I to can succeed…with out you I sort of feel lost…I must continue to believe that one day you will see, never let go of faith, continue to believe…the connection we share is much deeper then the eye can see… more of a connection of two souls that don't even need to be anywhere near each other …to know when there affection is in ne...ed…
More so you are the apple of my eye…my strength from deep within…the wind that blows through my hair…n the air that I breath…when my weakness gets the best of me and my knee's touch the ground, all I have to do is turn around to see, you're standing right behind me..(Waiting)..to reach out to me, just to tell me everything will be ok…to stop with the tears…reminding me…you will always be here…
It's you, I knew it all along…It's you, that makes my heart strong…I for see something…I can't explain
My only wish is to find you …when the time is right…cuz our love will brighten up the night…
I don't need you to be my man…just hold my hand…n be my best of friend till the end!!!!
More so you are the apple of my eye…my strength from deep within…the wind that blows through my hair…n the air that I breath…when my weakness gets the best of me and my knee's touch the ground, all I have to do is turn around to see, you're standing right behind me..(Waiting)..to reach out to me, just to tell me everything will be ok…to stop with the tears…reminding me…you will always be here…
It's you, I knew it all along…It's you, that makes my heart strong…I for see something…I can't explain
My only wish is to find you …when the time is right…cuz our love will brighten up the night…
I don't need you to be my man…just hold my hand…n be my best of friend till the end!!!!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
"Broken Promises"
You said you loved me, you said till the end, you even called me your princess, I just didn't realize the was then.....
So close, so soon, I figured forever at least, that is what you said! I guess you can't trust a man, well at least not you anyway.....
You broke my heart, I'm not going to lie, your the first guy I said I love you too, who said it back in 5 years. Broken promises whispered in my ear....deceiving stares while trying to speak so sincere....thanks though, because you just opened my door for bigger & better, I gave you everything I could even besides my heart & my trust....well they both just blew in the wind like the dust....
Broken promises floating in the air your words mean nothing, when trying to speak like you care.....
Broken promises you made, so cliche! It was like the wind passing by my ear a calm whistling sound, you could hear it, but you never get to see it!!!
Broken promises I have grown use too, you just proved you must be use to saying them, blame me?? Look in the mirror darling you have a lot of changing.....
I'm not perfect, but I claim my mistakes & whether you broke my heart, you will see me walk with my head straight, chin in the air, because your love means nothing now, I can't even stand the thought of your mug....
I will tell you this Broken promises won't stop me, from getting who & what I want, that is my dream & it will come in time! I just got to pass foolish fools like you....to reach the finish line & my guy standing & waiting to treat me like a queen because you see now i am searching for a king. A grown ass man, who knows where he has been & can treat a lady with respect & not act like a childish little kid....
So the moral here is your 6 month stop isn't stopping me, from moving forward. Heart is pure & ready for more of that sincere love that I adore, from a real man who is ready to make promises & keep them, like taking me to the alter & keep me & my family till the end!!!
Broken promises will never stop me, don't let them fool you!!!!
So close, so soon, I figured forever at least, that is what you said! I guess you can't trust a man, well at least not you anyway.....
You broke my heart, I'm not going to lie, your the first guy I said I love you too, who said it back in 5 years. Broken promises whispered in my ear....deceiving stares while trying to speak so sincere....thanks though, because you just opened my door for bigger & better, I gave you everything I could even besides my heart & my trust....well they both just blew in the wind like the dust....
Broken promises floating in the air your words mean nothing, when trying to speak like you care.....
Broken promises you made, so cliche! It was like the wind passing by my ear a calm whistling sound, you could hear it, but you never get to see it!!!
Broken promises I have grown use too, you just proved you must be use to saying them, blame me?? Look in the mirror darling you have a lot of changing.....
I'm not perfect, but I claim my mistakes & whether you broke my heart, you will see me walk with my head straight, chin in the air, because your love means nothing now, I can't even stand the thought of your mug....
I will tell you this Broken promises won't stop me, from getting who & what I want, that is my dream & it will come in time! I just got to pass foolish fools like you....to reach the finish line & my guy standing & waiting to treat me like a queen because you see now i am searching for a king. A grown ass man, who knows where he has been & can treat a lady with respect & not act like a childish little kid....
So the moral here is your 6 month stop isn't stopping me, from moving forward. Heart is pure & ready for more of that sincere love that I adore, from a real man who is ready to make promises & keep them, like taking me to the alter & keep me & my family till the end!!!
Broken promises will never stop me, don't let them fool you!!!!
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
"SOMEDAY"
Hey boy!! yeah you, come here!! I got something I want to show you. Look in my eye's, do you see it?? See what?? Look deeper!! I am trying, okay do you see it now?? Yes, I do!! Your soul, it is so beautiful!! Wow those other men were fools!! Hey boy!! Yes doll!! Can I keep you?? As long as you promise today & stay forever!! You got it!! <3
Hey babe!! Yes beautiful!! Do you love me?? Do you really need to ask?? Yes, just answer please?? Of course, I do!! You are the only one I met that has been so true!! Beautiful! Yes baby! Do you love me??
I love you with everything in me, I left you look as deep into my soul that is humanly possible, I gave you the key to open the door, you didn't even have to break down my wall, you had what it took "courage" to step from the dark and meet me around the corner.
Hey babe! Yes beautiful! I'm glad you're mine, I have you all the time & can reach out to you knowing your going to be there. I know you won't run, because you are a man of your word, you have what it takes to be with an independent woman with strong values and opinions, your not going to run with your tail between your legs, because you have proven to be a man who can stay!!! "I Love You"
Hey babe!! Yes beautiful!! Do you love me?? Do you really need to ask?? Yes, just answer please?? Of course, I do!! You are the only one I met that has been so true!! Beautiful! Yes baby! Do you love me??
I love you with everything in me, I left you look as deep into my soul that is humanly possible, I gave you the key to open the door, you didn't even have to break down my wall, you had what it took "courage" to step from the dark and meet me around the corner.
Hey babe! Yes beautiful! I'm glad you're mine, I have you all the time & can reach out to you knowing your going to be there. I know you won't run, because you are a man of your word, you have what it takes to be with an independent woman with strong values and opinions, your not going to run with your tail between your legs, because you have proven to be a man who can stay!!! "I Love You"
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Throw back: For men who play games!
I wrote this in 2008, I no longer feel this way, but it was one of my favorites back then. Thought I would put a throw back out there until I come up with something fresh.
THIS IS TA MEH FELLA'S..WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD RUN GAME..YOU STEPPED INTO MEH WORLD...A BITCH WHO KNOW'S THE GAME
IMA CHEW U UP..N..SPIT U OUT..CUZ I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHAT UR LOVES ABOUT..SAY THAT U LOVE ME..N..I'LL SAY THE SAME..WHEN U LEAST EXPECT..IMA RUN MEH GAME..
CALLIN ME BABY..SAYIN IM SWEET..THINKIN UR GETTIN SOMEWHERE CUZ IM ACTIN LIKE A FREAK..
FUCKIN WITH UR HEAD ..IS ALL ITS ABOUT..NO MORE LOVE FROM THIS BITCH..I JUS WANT TA CHEW U UP..N..SPIT YA OUT
I HAD A TASTE OF ALL THE FLAVA'S..BITTER SWEET IT IS..KNOWIN I CAN HAVE ANY MAN I WANT..WITH A LIL SHAKE OF THIS...
SHAKE..DROP..WITH A LIL SPIN..I HAVE YOU MUTHA FUCKA'S WANTIN TA HAVE MEH KIDS..
"OH SHIT..WHAT IS SHE DOIN!?!? FUCKIN WITH UR MIND..IS WHAT IM DOIN.."
I DON'T WANT NOTHIN FROM YA.SO PUT THAT CA$H AWAY..ID RATHER BE A BROKE BITCH..THEN GIVE YOU THE CHANCE TA SAY..YOU BOUGHT THE ROPE THAT IM ROCKIN..A SWEET LIL GIFT FROM U..
LIKE YOU CAN BUY MY LOVE OR SOMETHIN..THERE IS MORE TA ME THEN JUS MONEY..TRY IT ON ANOTHA HONEY..
BUT IF YA WANT THE GOODS..THESE PLAYA'S ALWAYS TALKIN BOUT..HOW GOOD IT FEELS WHEN A BITCH GOES DOWN..IF YA FEELIN HUNGRY..N..FEELIN LIKE A FREAK..I GOT SOMETHIN..IMA LET YA EAT..MUNCHIN ON MEH GOODIES.."OH THEY TASTE SO HEAVENLY SWEET" YOU'LL THINK YA STOPPED AT DAIRY QUEEN..N..HAD URSELF A TREAT..
FOR MEH FELLA'S WHO TRIED TO RUN GAME...
IMA CHEW U UP..N..SPIT U OUT..CUZ I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHAT UR LOVES ABOUT..SAY THAT U LOVE ME..N..I'LL SAY THE SAME..WHEN U LEAST EXPECT..IMA RUN MEH GAME..
CALLIN ME BABY..SAYIN IM SWEET..THINKIN UR GETTIN SOMEWHERE CUZ IM ACTIN LIKE A FREAK..
FUCKIN WITH UR HEAD ..IS ALL ITS ABOUT..NO MORE LOVE FROM THIS BITCH..I JUS WANT TA CHEW U UP..N..SPIT YA OUT
I HAD A TASTE OF ALL THE FLAVA'S..BITTER SWEET IT IS..KNOWIN I CAN HAVE ANY MAN I WANT..WITH A LIL SHAKE OF THIS...
SHAKE..DROP..WITH A LIL SPIN..I HAVE YOU MUTHA FUCKA'S WANTIN TA HAVE MEH KIDS..
"OH SHIT..WHAT IS SHE DOIN!?!? FUCKIN WITH UR MIND..IS WHAT IM DOIN.."
I DON'T WANT NOTHIN FROM YA.SO PUT THAT CA$H AWAY..ID RATHER BE A BROKE BITCH..THEN GIVE YOU THE CHANCE TA SAY..YOU BOUGHT THE ROPE THAT IM ROCKIN..A SWEET LIL GIFT FROM U..
LIKE YOU CAN BUY MY LOVE OR SOMETHIN..THERE IS MORE TA ME THEN JUS MONEY..TRY IT ON ANOTHA HONEY..
BUT IF YA WANT THE GOODS..THESE PLAYA'S ALWAYS TALKIN BOUT..HOW GOOD IT FEELS WHEN A BITCH GOES DOWN..IF YA FEELIN HUNGRY..N..FEELIN LIKE A FREAK..I GOT SOMETHIN..IMA LET YA EAT..MUNCHIN ON MEH GOODIES.."OH THEY TASTE SO HEAVENLY SWEET" YOU'LL THINK YA STOPPED AT DAIRY QUEEN..N..HAD URSELF A TREAT..
Friday, August 26, 2011
" Froze "
I'm sitting on the porch, looking at the star's, thinking about you, never thinking it would go this far, that you would of stole my heart! Just to let me stand in the dark, how could you break my heart??
My feet are not moving, my body can not move, I try to move forward, but my feet feel cemented to the ground......
I look around & no one is around, why can't I move" Why can't I go? I never deserved this major bump in the road.....No body really knows, why can't anyone know, why my body is froze??
As I 'm stuck in one place, my mind keeps spinning, so many memories, why was I drug down this road, to face this pain alone? What did I do to deserve this, can't you please explain this all too similar road??
There is no light, there is no answers, just my shadow coming from behind this silhouette that is stuck in one place, while I can't go no where, how could you leave me in this time of spare??
Now I'm standing here looking at the star's, thinking about you, never thinking it would go this far, that you would of stole my heart, just to leave me standing in the dark, how could you go and break my heart?
How?
My feet are not moving, my body can not move, I try to move forward, but my feet feel cemented to the ground......
I look around & no one is around, why can't I move" Why can't I go? I never deserved this major bump in the road.....No body really knows, why can't anyone know, why my body is froze??
As I 'm stuck in one place, my mind keeps spinning, so many memories, why was I drug down this road, to face this pain alone? What did I do to deserve this, can't you please explain this all too similar road??
There is no light, there is no answers, just my shadow coming from behind this silhouette that is stuck in one place, while I can't go no where, how could you leave me in this time of spare??
Now I'm standing here looking at the star's, thinking about you, never thinking it would go this far, that you would of stole my heart, just to leave me standing in the dark, how could you go and break my heart?
How?
Monday, August 8, 2011
" Baby making hoe's "
Oh baby!! Promise you will take care of me, I just want to keep spreading my legs making these babies!!!
I decided my future, I'm doing to live off of you, gonna raise your rates, cause you know what?? fuck you & your future!!!
Don't you know it is all about me!!! Come on baby just see the way I see!!!!
I'm going to live just the way I like, spending your money & partying all night!!! It's up to you to pay for my babies, oh how I love this freedom of just fucking who I please, knowing, I can drain your bank account as I please!!!
As long as the government keeps paying for me, I can continue to play while kneeling on my knee's ;-)
I have plenty of family to watch over my mini me's!!! Man this is the life acting like a hoe, knowing everything I want comes to me basically free!!!!!
I decided my future, I'm doing to live off of you, gonna raise your rates, cause you know what?? fuck you & your future!!!
Don't you know it is all about me!!! Come on baby just see the way I see!!!!
I'm going to live just the way I like, spending your money & partying all night!!! It's up to you to pay for my babies, oh how I love this freedom of just fucking who I please, knowing, I can drain your bank account as I please!!!
As long as the government keeps paying for me, I can continue to play while kneeling on my knee's ;-)
I have plenty of family to watch over my mini me's!!! Man this is the life acting like a hoe, knowing everything I want comes to me basically free!!!!!
" KARMA "
I'm laughing at you dumb mother fuckers, threatening me, get in line, i'm not scared, don't you see???
hahahahahaha " I KNOW MY OWN DESTINY "
Do what you want & what you feel, you will not be the end of me...keep plotting and planning, I'm waiting for you, you all run your mouth, but no one ever steps to me.....
Don't be scared, hell cause I am not!!! all of you bitches will burn in hell before I die!!!!
Karma is a bitch & she coming for you all, you may be able to hide from everyone else, but you can't hide from her at all!!!
So.......
1,2 karma can see you, 3,4 you better start praying some more, 5,6 she hates dirty tricks, 7,8 you will be left behind hells gates, 9, 10 I'm still standing and hello that is the end :-)
"Karma" you can't see her, but best believe, she can see you & she got tunnel vision & she is headed right for you!!!!
Now that's the end!!!
hahahahahaha " I KNOW MY OWN DESTINY "
Do what you want & what you feel, you will not be the end of me...keep plotting and planning, I'm waiting for you, you all run your mouth, but no one ever steps to me.....
Don't be scared, hell cause I am not!!! all of you bitches will burn in hell before I die!!!!
Karma is a bitch & she coming for you all, you may be able to hide from everyone else, but you can't hide from her at all!!!
So.......
1,2 karma can see you, 3,4 you better start praying some more, 5,6 she hates dirty tricks, 7,8 you will be left behind hells gates, 9, 10 I'm still standing and hello that is the end :-)
"Karma" you can't see her, but best believe, she can see you & she got tunnel vision & she is headed right for you!!!!
Now that's the end!!!
Sunday, July 24, 2011
" Strength "
It's so sad, when you looked in her eye's! She would of broke your heart with the tears from her eye's!
If you would of took the time to listen and learn, she could have taught you something, but their was no time for her. All she wanted was love and just needed you, but you kept turning your back on the love that she returned.
It's so sad, when you looked in her eye's! She would of broke your heart with the tears from her eye's!
She would have showed you a whole another world, but you couldn't look past your selfish concerns. She would of took you to a whole another place, so beautiful, the light that would have shined in your face, her soul would of have been revealed, you would have been forever changed.
Since you paid no mind, she went about her way, kept her faith and prayed every single day. She knew he saw her sadness and would answer her pain because........
It's so sad when you look in her eye's! She would have broke your heart from the tears from her eye's!!
She was brought to her knee's from darkness of your soul, but you couldn't brake her faith, cause love in her heart kept her strong! She knew she would be free, to live the life she deserved and no longer would you see.....
The sadness in her eye's! Cause she was set to be free!!!
If you would of took the time to listen and learn, she could have taught you something, but their was no time for her. All she wanted was love and just needed you, but you kept turning your back on the love that she returned.
It's so sad, when you looked in her eye's! She would of broke your heart with the tears from her eye's!
She would have showed you a whole another world, but you couldn't look past your selfish concerns. She would of took you to a whole another place, so beautiful, the light that would have shined in your face, her soul would of have been revealed, you would have been forever changed.
Since you paid no mind, she went about her way, kept her faith and prayed every single day. She knew he saw her sadness and would answer her pain because........
It's so sad when you look in her eye's! She would have broke your heart from the tears from her eye's!!
She was brought to her knee's from darkness of your soul, but you couldn't brake her faith, cause love in her heart kept her strong! She knew she would be free, to live the life she deserved and no longer would you see.....
The sadness in her eye's! Cause she was set to be free!!!
Friday, May 27, 2011
" you feeling hungry baby"
You feeling hungry, baby?? Well let me take care of that, I have a full course meal if you’re down with that. If you’re a freak and you are starving, I will let you have an all you can eat buffet. You can’t ask for much more, because once you get a taste of these juices, hahahaha their will be no more to look for, your journey for love will be finished, because I will hypnotize you, and no others you will see, while they are trying to grab your attention. Your mind will only be able to think of me, and how great my juices flow!!!
So bitches back off, because I am not going anywhere, I am here to stay. Now that you shut your lip, it is time for josh and I to play. Lets get dirty with it, minds straight to the gutter, sooner than later you will be having me stutter.
You have me in a frenzy, because your body got me sweating and asking for more, shhhhhhhhhhh honey, lets take this too the floor.
Face down ass up you know that’s how I like to fuck!! You just can’t jump into it you have to tease me in order to please me!! Lick me from head to toe & you ought to know exactly where and how I like it!! That’s another reason we are so perfect, I don’t have to tell you, you already know!!!
Thursday, May 19, 2011
"KEEPING IT DIRTY"
(MARCY)
I'm a be your girl, I'm a be your baby, I'm a be your ride or die lady!!!
There is no need to look because i'm a be there, standing right beside you, because I'm a bitch with flare....
I'm fierce, I'm fire, I will continue to be your desire...
You're that one that ignites that fire & uncontrollably continues to satisfy my desire!!!
It's not a verbal seduction or a sensual seduction, FUCK ALL that it's a SEXUAL SEDUCTION!!!
You not only beat it up, eat it up & lick it up until I scream, you continue to please me until I cream......
Your hands all over me making me quiver, your soft lips making me shiver!!!!
Work that tongue like a tornado baby, make me squirt all over your face like crazy, baby!!!
I love how you work your way up my thigh. Now it's my turn to please my guy. I'm a suck you off till you cum like a tsunami, make a river flow all over my body!!!
I'm a be your girl, I'm a be your baby, I'm a be your ride or die lady!!! Mess with my baby & I'm a go CRAZY!!!!
(JOSH)
That's my girl, that's my baby, she is my ride or die lady!!!
I'm a be your girl, I'm a be your baby, I'm a be your ride or die lady!!!
There is no need to look because i'm a be there, standing right beside you, because I'm a bitch with flare....
I'm fierce, I'm fire, I will continue to be your desire...
You're that one that ignites that fire & uncontrollably continues to satisfy my desire!!!
It's not a verbal seduction or a sensual seduction, FUCK ALL that it's a SEXUAL SEDUCTION!!!
You not only beat it up, eat it up & lick it up until I scream, you continue to please me until I cream......
Your hands all over me making me quiver, your soft lips making me shiver!!!!
Work that tongue like a tornado baby, make me squirt all over your face like crazy, baby!!!
I love how you work your way up my thigh. Now it's my turn to please my guy. I'm a suck you off till you cum like a tsunami, make a river flow all over my body!!!
I'm a be your girl, I'm a be your baby, I'm a be your ride or die lady!!! Mess with my baby & I'm a go CRAZY!!!!
(JOSH)
That's my girl, that's my baby, she is my ride or die lady!!!
First things first, kisses full of bliss. Workin from ur neck 2 ur tits.
Kinky twists from soft lips. Won’t stop till I get every drip from ur
Nips Lovin the way ur movin ur frame honey. U say knowledge is power
So while im lickin ur flower, get brain honey. Cuz I love the way u drop ur
Ass make it rain on me. I want all of ur bodily fluids 2 drain on me. Ride
The pole like a stripper, work my main vein honey. Don’t stop love… u got
Me goin insane honey, we can take it 2 the plane honey. Bus, Yacht or train
HoneY, no need 4 permission fucking in every position, with every incision
Because makin you cum is the only mission. And then u just take control, tell
Me 2 fuck you hard or slow, or 2 dig deep and hold. UR TOES CURL AND EYES
START TO ROLL, BREATHING GETS HEAVY AND OXYGEN IS GETTIN LOW…
START TO ROLL, BREATHING GETS HEAVY AND OXYGEN IS GETTIN LOW…
SOOO HOLD ON LOVE CUZ IM READY BLOOOOWW!!!!!!
That's my girl, that's my baby, she is my ride or die lady!!!!
Mess with her & i'm a go CRAZY!!!!
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
"POISON"
Tearing her down, making her feel a little less, yelling at her for putting mascara on her eye's. Trying to convince her with your bull-shit lies. Oh well, I just thought you're prettier with out it. "Ok fool I don't it"
It's just your possessiveness and jealous-ness "afraid she will catch a look from another guy!
She speaks her mind, this infuriates his mind, he reaches for her throat, while looking right into her eye's "you fucking bitch how dare you speak to me like this" now go change your clothe. Don't think you're going to let the world see you dressed like this.
Cause god forbid someone may catch a glance "of this beautiful woman, cover & all" She now walks with her head down, watching every step because she refuses to fall. Don't look up, because someone may see the truth, that things are not what they always appear to be.
With hat and resentment growing in her heart. She can barely stand to look at the man she had loved from the start. His every touch makes her cringe, every kiss turns her stomach. Unless she lets him get his fuck in, she will never hear the end of it, not to mention all of the threatening "well if you don't put out, I will just find someone who does"?? hahaha, and this is something that already wasn't of.....
She stepped up like a man in the middle of his fights, she screamed and yelled at the law just to keep him out of jail for the night.....
She had proved love and willingness to keep him safe....
She never placed him second, to her that would never be right...
But if you went to find her she was always out of site, this because he placed her on the back burner, everyone came before her....
The tinest things could trigger his temper, just enough to give him a reason to go fuck with a fling, then he comes back convincing her he is sorry....
This becomes a situation that is repeated time N time again....
But the blinded eye still couldn't see, her precious love could be so deceiving...
Phone calls are starting, bitches are calling, trying to step in between, she fights and yells with all these stupid bitches, you better be taken his name off your list, because this is the only pussy he be licking....
A beautiful relationship, with only one blinded eye, always doubted that her man could lie.....
His eye's were so convincing, especially with a smile, she believed every word of his, boy was she in denial.....
Kissing and hugging her telling her everything she wanted to hear, running a good game, he should of got playa of the year!!!!
It's just your possessiveness and jealous-ness "afraid she will catch a look from another guy!
She speaks her mind, this infuriates his mind, he reaches for her throat, while looking right into her eye's "you fucking bitch how dare you speak to me like this" now go change your clothe. Don't think you're going to let the world see you dressed like this.
Cause god forbid someone may catch a glance "of this beautiful woman, cover & all" She now walks with her head down, watching every step because she refuses to fall. Don't look up, because someone may see the truth, that things are not what they always appear to be.
With hat and resentment growing in her heart. She can barely stand to look at the man she had loved from the start. His every touch makes her cringe, every kiss turns her stomach. Unless she lets him get his fuck in, she will never hear the end of it, not to mention all of the threatening "well if you don't put out, I will just find someone who does"?? hahaha, and this is something that already wasn't of.....
She stepped up like a man in the middle of his fights, she screamed and yelled at the law just to keep him out of jail for the night.....
She had proved love and willingness to keep him safe....
She never placed him second, to her that would never be right...
But if you went to find her she was always out of site, this because he placed her on the back burner, everyone came before her....
The tinest things could trigger his temper, just enough to give him a reason to go fuck with a fling, then he comes back convincing her he is sorry....
This becomes a situation that is repeated time N time again....
But the blinded eye still couldn't see, her precious love could be so deceiving...
Phone calls are starting, bitches are calling, trying to step in between, she fights and yells with all these stupid bitches, you better be taken his name off your list, because this is the only pussy he be licking....
A beautiful relationship, with only one blinded eye, always doubted that her man could lie.....
His eye's were so convincing, especially with a smile, she believed every word of his, boy was she in denial.....
Kissing and hugging her telling her everything she wanted to hear, running a good game, he should of got playa of the year!!!!
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Emotionally hitting rock bottom
As I sit here wondering what the hell to write about, my mind has a thousand things, I'd like to talk about, to get out. Just try & put it on paper. I go from hating to loving to saying goodbye, right back to I will survive....Wondering how people are going to take what I got to say, but I'm the first one to tell you "who gives a fuck, what they got to say". Everyone hs an opinion & of course some may conflict, but fuck that bitch!!! Why the hell you reading my shit??
I'm a tell my story from 2007. When I "Emotionally hit rock bottom"
Your mind doesn't stop wondering your heart is beating out your chest, you can't understand this, because all you have been doing was laying to rest...You just wanna go to sleep but your mind won't shut off. It's is driving you crazy. Your kids are fast asleep & you have to be up for work. You're wondering why the fuck is this happening. Then you realize your bodies shutting down, you can't eat "you try" because you do want to survive. You can't sleep & even at times it feels hard to breathe, kind of like your head is closing in. You are trying to fight what feels like a losing battle, but you don't give up, because you don't want to feel this way. You are looking at your kids wondering why are they not enough to snap you out of this? Instead of it pulling you out, it pushes you further in, because now the guilt has set in, you're feeling horrible they're your world & would do anything for them, yet they find you on the bathroom floor again....
So after 3 weeks of having no control of my emotions & walking around like a zombie, my body just there....They truly did find me on the floor & it was who I call one of my "angels in disguise" who litterally picked me up & put me in the car, because I was slowly fading away. My brother Tim & my oldest daughter Trinity took me to the emergency room....I remember laying in the bed starring at Trinity & I got a little spark of hope, yet that sick feeling because she is seeing me like this....
My doctor comes in & begins to speak of course it wasn't hard to tell I was lost just by looking at me. He says do you have suicidile thoughts?? I instantly said no....I have everything & two beautiful girls to live for...I fought for 3 weeks force feeding myself & vomitting everytime the food touched my mouth. I had no feelings other then my insides constantly shaking....I truly thought & was worried I was lost for good, yet always kept my faith....So with telling you this, now you know why my skin is so thick & I show emotion, when I want too. I am stronger then I have ever been in my life. I was one of the first ones to say "You have to be weak, in order to know how to be strong"
Learning from the situation & seeing how my kids couldn't help at the moment, is the very reason they are now my strength & my sanity that keeps me grounded!!! There will be NO MORE FALLING!!!
(ONCE YOU HIT ROCK BOTTOM "EMOTIONALLY") There is NO going back!!!!
Monday, April 4, 2011
The letter to Senator Casey! I took out a few things for privacy matters:
Attention Senator Casey,
It was brought to my attention on your website that you had the honor to witness the signing of a historic legislation on March 23rd 2011 to improve health care for millions of Pennsylvanians. The patient protection and affordable care act will provide more security for those who have insurance and expand coverage to more than 32 million people who do not have coverage. This new law will reduce costs for Americans and reduce the deficit by $143 billion over the next ten years.
This would be the reason and concern I have for writing this letter to you. My mother who has been diagnosed with congestive heart failure & coronary artery disease has been battling a fight for the past 2 yrs now. Who personally does not have insurance and can’t get help through the government coverage.
I will take you back to 1996 when she first became disabled, she was a hard working woman who worked her whole life and in or around 96 had a heart attack, which lead to a triple bypass and being disabled. She loved to work and she never once asked to be put in the system, but without hesitation was grateful for being eligible for disability she had a family to take care of. She never picked up the insurance that was offered through medicare because my father was still working and had great insurance. Which by the way saved the system at the time $45,000. She felt it was good enough that they helped her with the disability she didn’t want to take the insurance as well. Not knowing in the near future my father was going to lose his job after 30 years of employment which left her with no insurance and soon following my father having a stroke which now leaves them both disabled. Which means they live month to month on a fixed income. I know my family is not the only ones going through this there are millions. I am writing to you, because in the past two years I have almost lost my mother several times. She has been denied help so many times, so I thought it was time to go higher and see if you can help save my mom. She recently had angioplasty done in the summer of 2010 which was a stent put into her heart, well a few weeks ago, it ended up clogging up and they had to go in with a balloon and release the blockage. My mom’s whole body is covered in blockages the only good part of her body AT THE MOMENT is her brain. She must undergo a stent surgery on both her legs because of severe blockages which makes it difficult to walk. With having said that, there is not a vascular specialist who will do the surgery because of having no insurance. Since she is disabled she called Medicaid to see if she could pick up the insurance but since she didn’t do it from the start she will be penalized with a double payment they said for the rest of your life.
Okay now you have two elderly people living on a fixed income of :
My father’s before taxes: after all the deductions Like and an additional for plan b and a few other deductions is what is take home is.
My mother’s set income is. This is what they have to go on for a month. They have their every day bills, now tons of hospital bills and doctor bills not to mention medications.
I am writing to you to see if there is something you can do to help save my mom. It was said if her hands turn purple or her feet turn an odd white to go straight to the hospital, this means it is now going to your brain. Why and I ask why again would you not just help and fix someone right away before there is a chance it could be too late. All she wants is the opportunity to pay what everyone else pays for Medicaid. They can barely survive month to month now.
I believe this country has things twisted and backwards. We can send troops over sea’s and destroy cities and use US dollars to rebuild and help with other countries to rebuild after natural disasters. Don’t get me wrong, my family who has nothing we always try and donate where it is needed and we have nothing. Now I am asking that you help the people of your country to live a longer life that they deserve.
I am begging you to help me and my family get through this time of need! I am awaiting your response and truly hope there is something you can do to help the people of your state!
Thanks again,
Marcy Schulze (Daughter of Elizabeth Schulze “who the letter is about”
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
" My Angel With Wings"
My Angel with wings, my beauty in the sky, as I bow my head with the thought: "why oh why"?? There is a song in my heart & I am singing silently for you!! Just know I will always & forever miss you!!
Today was a day I never wanted to see, today was the day, I had to watch you leave....
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My Soul, My Everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Everything!!!
Today I cried a tear, today that tear drop fell...I caught it in my hand & wished you could come back again!!!
As I bow my head & begin to cry, screaming & yelling " why oh why"?? I drop to my knee's & I turn to see if it's possible, could you be standing right behind me?? To my surprise you were not there. Reality is kicking in, he really took you from me.....
As I am sitting There thinking & trying to figure this out....I hear your voice whisper in my ear "my body might not be close, but my spirit is always near"
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My Soul, My everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Everything!!!!
From my guiding light -N- my bright star, you will always be my angel. I can now feel your presence your guidance is appreciated, the sun is now shinning down from the heavens. He took our angel, well his angel too....you have to know I will always miss you!!
I've pleaded & begged trying to get him to see, the beauty & love you brought to others lives, you were a blessing for many, I only hope you seen!!! So instead of crying & asking "why oh why" I have accepted, I now have a beautiful angel watching over me!!!
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My soul, My Everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Angel with wings!!!
Today was a day I never wanted to see, today was the day, I had to watch you leave....
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My Soul, My Everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Everything!!!
Today I cried a tear, today that tear drop fell...I caught it in my hand & wished you could come back again!!!
As I bow my head & begin to cry, screaming & yelling " why oh why"?? I drop to my knee's & I turn to see if it's possible, could you be standing right behind me?? To my surprise you were not there. Reality is kicking in, he really took you from me.....
As I am sitting There thinking & trying to figure this out....I hear your voice whisper in my ear "my body might not be close, but my spirit is always near"
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My Soul, My everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Everything!!!!
From my guiding light -N- my bright star, you will always be my angel. I can now feel your presence your guidance is appreciated, the sun is now shinning down from the heavens. He took our angel, well his angel too....you have to know I will always miss you!!
I've pleaded & begged trying to get him to see, the beauty & love you brought to others lives, you were a blessing for many, I only hope you seen!!! So instead of crying & asking "why oh why" I have accepted, I now have a beautiful angel watching over me!!!
My Strength, My Rock, My Sanity
My Heart, My soul, My Everything
You were, You are, You will always be
My Angel with wings!!!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
"Promise"
I have a sparkle in my eye....
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
You're gonna come in like a lion....
There is no going out like a lamb...
You're gonna stand by my side & SHOUT!! " I AM PROUD TO BE HER MAN"
You will make promises you know you can keep!!
You're going to treat me like a lady, cause you know I ain't cheap!!
You're going to turn a cheek, from the bull-shit they speak & allow your love to leak from your heart & finally let our future start!!
We can now live for the present, no more hesi-tation & our connection has finally connected!!
Linked our hearts & minds, we now share the same vision!!
There has been a collision, let's just call it what it is "True Love" <3 <3<3<3
I have a sparkle in my eye....
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
I am going to make promises I know I can keep!!
I will SHOUT!! " HE IS THE MAN I WANT TO KEEP " by my side forever & through out!!
A promise for a life time is what you will hear me SHOUT!
I got a sparkle in my eye....
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
<3<3<3<3
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
You're gonna come in like a lion....
There is no going out like a lamb...
You're gonna stand by my side & SHOUT!! " I AM PROUD TO BE HER MAN"
You will make promises you know you can keep!!
You're going to treat me like a lady, cause you know I ain't cheap!!
You're going to turn a cheek, from the bull-shit they speak & allow your love to leak from your heart & finally let our future start!!
We can now live for the present, no more hesi-tation & our connection has finally connected!!
Linked our hearts & minds, we now share the same vision!!
There has been a collision, let's just call it what it is "True Love" <3 <3<3<3
I have a sparkle in my eye....
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
I am going to make promises I know I can keep!!
I will SHOUT!! " HE IS THE MAN I WANT TO KEEP " by my side forever & through out!!
A promise for a life time is what you will hear me SHOUT!
I got a sparkle in my eye....
A skip in my step....
A flutter in my heart & yes, you're the cause of it!!
<3<3<3<3
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
"No More"
Do you love me?
Of course I do!
Then why do you hurt me?
I'm sorry baby, this time it's true!
Why would I believe you?
Because I'm telling you the truth!
Like the truth, you spoke of before?!?
Come on baby, you said let the past go!
I know, but I've also let our love go!!
You want me, I want you, We want each other & then it's thru....
I love you, you love me, we love each other & then it's on to the fuck you!!
A harsh cycle, that's impossible to break, I'm cutting the cord for this I can not take, I will not take this shit any more....
A life time of the singles life is not what I want, but I want it more then the continuous fight that we do....
Hands on me, hands on you, physical violence! Psh, nothing new, cutting me up & downing you! Verbal abuse, is what we're use too....
Bonnie & Clyde they say....
Don't ya know that they are thru, just like me & you....
They both both died, just like the love between us two!!
I want it, you don't....
You want, I won't....fight for you, let it go, set if free & let it blow
away!!!!
Watch what we once had slowly disintegrate!!!
Do you love me?
Of course I do!
Then why do you hurt me?
I'm sorry baby, this time it's true!
Why would I believe you?
Because I'm telling you the truth!
Like the truth, you spoke of before?
Come on baby, you said let the past go!
I know, but I've also let our love go!!
Of course I do!
Then why do you hurt me?
I'm sorry baby, this time it's true!
Why would I believe you?
Because I'm telling you the truth!
Like the truth, you spoke of before?!?
Come on baby, you said let the past go!
I know, but I've also let our love go!!
You want me, I want you, We want each other & then it's thru....
I love you, you love me, we love each other & then it's on to the fuck you!!
A harsh cycle, that's impossible to break, I'm cutting the cord for this I can not take, I will not take this shit any more....
A life time of the singles life is not what I want, but I want it more then the continuous fight that we do....
Hands on me, hands on you, physical violence! Psh, nothing new, cutting me up & downing you! Verbal abuse, is what we're use too....
Bonnie & Clyde they say....
Don't ya know that they are thru, just like me & you....
They both both died, just like the love between us two!!
I want it, you don't....
You want, I won't....fight for you, let it go, set if free & let it blow
away!!!!
Watch what we once had slowly disintegrate!!!
Do you love me?
Of course I do!
Then why do you hurt me?
I'm sorry baby, this time it's true!
Why would I believe you?
Because I'm telling you the truth!
Like the truth, you spoke of before?
Come on baby, you said let the past go!
I know, but I've also let our love go!!
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